I have always wanted to blog something in here, but I was always put off at the end of the day. Either I chat too much on ICQ or MSN, or I was made tired by other things. But I am more determined now to have my words out. My Christian life is rotting away, and not more than once God is trying to wake me up. I remember so clearly once as I was worshipping in church, God spoke to me about Jesus waking the girl up from her slumber, and that girl was supposed to be dead, but He said she was just sleeping. I guess that very much described my condition then. Am I still asleep? Or am I really dead now? I don't know.

One thing that continues to soothe my nerves, and calm me, gives me much security is the fact and knowledge that God loves me, He's still continually wooing me. But am I taking all this for granted? I hope not. I may at times use this as an excuse to do other things, knowing that God will still have me back in the end. I guess I never learn, not until God teaches me the hard way. Now I can fairly understand why some children need to be brought up with the rod. It hurts bothway, to the parent and the child.

Sigh... the thing about me and God. When will this all come to an end? When will I start to take God seriously? But I don't want to end up like a square-faced Christian. That is something which I guess I will never be able to do. To lead a boring do-it-all-right Christian life. Yet I remember Pastor saying that Christian life is not all that boring. There are so many things out there that require so much of faith and boldness. So what does it take to be right with God?